This file was submitted by Lanette Currington.


Good news .....



The Stress Diet
(This diet is designed to help you cope with the stress that
builds during the course of the day.)

BREAKFAST

1/2 grapefruit

1 slice of whole wheat toast

8 oz. low fat or skim milk

LUNCH

4 oz lean broiled chicken breast

1 cup steamed spinach

1 cup herbal tea

1 Oreo cookie

MID-AFTERNOON SNACK

Rest of Oreos in pack

2 pints Haagen Daz ice cream

1 jar hot fudge sauce

nuts, cherries, whipped cream

DINNER

2 loaves garlic bread with cheese

large sausage & cheese pizza

4 cans or 1 large pitcher beer (non-alcoholic, I sure hope)

3 Milky Way candy bars

LATE EVENING NEWS

Entire frozen Sara Lee cheesecake eaten directly from the
freezer.

RULES FOR THIS DIET

1. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no
calories.

2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in
the candy bar are cancelled out by the diet soda.

3. When you eat with someone else, calories don't count as long
as you don't eat more than they do.

4. Food used for medicinal purposes never counts, such as hot
chocolate, brandy, toast, and Sara Lee cheese cake.

5. If you fatten up the people around you, then you look
thinner.

6. Movie-related foods do not have additional calories because
they are part of the entire entainment package and are not part of
one's personal intake. Examples are Milk Duds, buttered popcorn, Jr.
Mints, Red Hots and Tootsie Rolls.

7. Cookie pieces contain no calories. The process of breaking
causes caloric leakage.

8. Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you
are in the process of preparing something. Examples are peanut butter
on a knife while making a sandwich or ice cream on a spoon while
making a sundae.

9. Foods that have the same color have the same number of
calories. Examples include spinach and pistachio ice cream, califlower and
whipped cream.

NOTE: Chocolate is a universal substitute and may be used in
place of any other food.


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